Let's talk balls baby

Sigh. I am 28. At times, I seriously feel that everyone is younger than I am. An entire generation that was in diapers just yesterday is now hip-hopping in boob tubes and chest-hugging tee shirts. And the men...boys...men...have GOOD bodies I tell you. Siiiiiiigh. I cannot even letch at a guy for fear that he would be WAY younger. And well, almost everyone is WAY younger.

They say that age doesn’t matter. Sure. It fucking matters when you get ‘looks’ from 24-year-old chicks. It sure gets funny when the moment you start talking to a guy, his girlfriend magically materializes within two seconds. And you are JUST talking to the guy. And dude, if you happen to bump into someone – say a guy and girl dancing together – while dancing and smile… you are done in. For the rest of the evening, the girl will give you looks that will make you doubt if you had merely smiled at the guy or had you perhaps fondled his crotch or something.

And what’s with women – smart, pretty, apparently with their own identities – declaring Who they are dating the moment they meet you? Or is it just me? "Hi, I am so-and-so and the guy you see there? He is my boyfriend.' Oh great, hope you put it up on wikipedia or something or how about wearing a He Is Mine tee shirt and putting your boyfriend's picture on it so that other chicks know WHO to avoid? The other night as well, sat down next to some girls and well, for some strange reason, one of them pointed out her boyfriend and her friend’s boyfriend as well. Erm… ??

Ladies, ladies. I am really not into ‘attached’ men. If they leave you and they interest me, sure, why not? But TILL any man is dating/married to/seeing Any woman, I won’t venture near. Even if say by any remote chance that man turns out to be my soul mate or something. I would leave him alone. Just don’t agree to the idea of taking another woman’s man, no matter how much of a bitch that woman is. But yes, if your guy happens to be an interesting PERSON – and piques my interest, well – I will talk, no matter how many daggers you send my way. You want to put embargoes on your guy, go ahead.

AND what’s with women bitching about you in stage whispers loud enough for you to hear? Really now. Think about it: If I am doing what I am doing, the way I am doing it, night after night, would I really bother about what you have to say? If I stay quiet, it’s out of a new-found respect for maintaining some basic level of politeness. I AM growing up, you know. So the Whispering Loudly Bitches always need another female to feel brave and bitch about you…Roll their eyes, look at each other with the oh-god-what-she’s-doing look and generally try and feel superior about themselves when they really have no reason to. Really.

Now think ladies – or this particular lady who has now tried to act smarter than her fucking pants on two different occasions where I had done nothing to her – you might need a friend to do your nasty-talk thing. I have been going solo and doing what I am doing for 9 years now and can QUITE stand up for myself. So baby girl, sweet possum, honey bun… if I decide to strip you of your dignity in public, I wouldn’t need any company. I am quite capable of raping your mind verbally, right then and there, just you and me. Everyone has insecurities, but it does not mean that you assuage your lack of confidence by saying nasty things about me.

People say one should not “let things bother” you and “let things slide” and not be vindictive. But tell me something, isn’t there a limit to everything? WHY should I – when I pay for my own taxi, my own cigarettes and my own drinks – let You get away with spoiling my evening? No. Because you are not worth it. And since you are not worth it, you will NOT say trash about me.
First, develop the balls or the ovaries or Fallopian tubes or whatever. WHY I am REALLY pissed is because these bitchy, fucking, pseudo women in the city will FIRST bitch about you, then suddenly come and hug you and go, “Oh what a nice ear ring”, “What a sexy top” etc. Cut the crap woman. Go clutch your boyfriend and get paranoid that he’d run away. I wont do a thing about your men or your friend circle you hold so dear… but are you so sure about your guy? Hah.

Post Scrap: Global Underground came down to India for the first time and brought ‘Mashtronic’ to the Ministry of Sound in Delhi. The night rockkkkked.