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February 27, 2009

"And your mother too"

12 comments
<--- How to ensure a good weekend when Partner is away... 1. Try new SFF (science-fiction-fantasy) author... However, it's grandly irritating that these days authors don't finish a story in a trilogy. Isobelle Carmody's Obernewtyn series runs into seven bloody books. (And am now starting on those...) 7 X 25.5= do the math.

Given that Sara Douglass' third book in the Darkglass Mountain series -- The Infinity Gate -- is supposed to hit book-shelves on/around May 26th this year; it's a long wait. I cannot even curse Sara to hurry up because the dear storyteller is underoing chemotherapy. I love her writing. If at all I have spent money reading Terry Brooks, Fiona McIntosh, Stefan Brijs, Stephen Donaldson (groan) and Stephenie Meyer (bigger groan), it's because I am waiting for Infinity Gate... Oh Ms. Douglass, do get well soon. Someday perhaps, I shall either interview you or sit and discuss plot-lines. (Weekend also involves day-dreaming)

2. See the movies I've really been meaning to see: That would NOT include full-of-full-frontals French movie Romance or that loser-werewolf crap called Skinwalkers. I mean, what self-respecting werewolf remains wearing jeans and a leather jacket when s/he phases? 'Phasing' is when a human shifts shape into werewolf and back. More insulting, was when three of the bad-werewolves -- those who still kill human beings -- are busy feeding; the female werewolf and leader werewolf are busy screwing. WTF?! Aren't they hungry or what?! If it was that bloody easy to control werewolves, Remus Lupin would never have died. And DON'T ask me WHO Remus Lupin is. Scoff.

Thank-you to all those who recommended City of God. I LOVED the movie, loved it, loved it, loved it. And highly recommend it to the miniscule who haven't seen it yet. Isko kehte hain piktar! And again, Rio and Mumbai...the similarities shook me. But that some other time...

As for Romance, it was scandal for nothing. The scandal was because the movie had real sex scenes; as in the characters actually do it instead of just simulating sex sequences. Apparently the movie was banned in Australia because the film board here could not find the right rating. Seriously, it should be banned, it's SO badly made. As one reviewer on Rotten Tomatoes says, "Porn was never so sleepy." If it was a blog though, it would run away with traffic. One scene stood out -- only one -- when the girl screws this street-bum and as he is finishing he screams, "Whore! Slut! I did you good!" and she starts howling and screams back, "I am not ashamed." That was the whole point of the movie and in my humble opinion, only that scene managed it.

3. Drink lots of wine, coffee and cola. Have donuts and Lindt's Lindor dark chocolate truffles for accompaniment.
4. Sleep.
5. Blog.
6. Clean house.
7. Maybe cook something...
8. Maybe put it up on my food blog.
9. Try not to mope.
10. Count hours till Partner comes back...

PS: Partner has gone for a buck's weekend...that would be a bachelor-party-weekend. There will be nearly-30 men drinking, playing golf, swimming, drinking, cracking dirty farts and dirty jokes, playing some more golf, drinking... you get the picture? Why don't girls do anything like this? The girl's version is called a hens' party. But isn't 'doe' the female to buck?? Why hen?!! And hell...if I ever get married here... who will come for my hens? I have no hens. :(
I miss my friends.

February 26, 2009

Nominate your favourite blogger!

9 comments
There are stupid days and then there are days when we (read me) are being extremely stupid. I seem to have stupid weeks. And I leave evidence. Here are some vital statistics of stupid proportions:

1. Number of times I've congratulated women on their "babies" when they don't have babies (some are not even married): 5 times last week

2. Number of times I've completely misunderstood another blogger's point-of-view and left a comment that shows how stupid I am: Undisclosed... but
here's one very recent proof...

3. Weight gained in last 7 months: 9 kilos!!!!


4. Number of chocolates eaten in one day: 9, Cadbury's frogs; maybe if they were another shape -- kangaroos or cows -- I would have eaten more.

5. Number of wrong bra purchases, because my size is constantly fluctuating: 4 times since being in Melbourne, which translates into more than $ 400 AUD. No, 'they' are not silicon or helium.

6. Number of times I've made plans to "hang out" with people and then ditched due to legit (or not) reasons: 10 or more

7. Number of times I have whined I-don't-have-friends and then proceeded to do Point No. 6: 20 or more

8. Number of time
s I've started a list post and stopped because I got bored: Countless, you can count this as one. Can't think of more... But yes, this will be the FIRST time I am going to be nominating my favourite bloggers for the IndiBloggies. Don't know what that is? Read on...


But before that, help me find someone... I saved (<---) this picture from a blog... I can't seem to find the link! I NEED to find that link again...it's a picture from Varanasi and the monkey is called Chhotu... PLEASE SEND ME BLOG NAME IF YOU KNOW THE BLOG! (This is so stupid)

Here goes about IndiBloggies 2008:

Do you read and follow blogs? Do you want to show your appreciation for the blog/bloggers you like? Participate in this!
(A copy-paste from the email from IndiBlogger.in)

The Indibloggies is back!

Indibloggies, India’s first and foremost blog awards has unveiled its annual nomination process for the 2008 edition. This is the sixth year of the Indibloggies award, organised by Pune-based blogger Debashish Chakrabarty.

The nominations are open in 17 different award categories for Indian blogs from all around the world until 6th March 2009. At stake are prizes worth more than One Lakh Rupees!

The winners will be announced in the first week of April, 2009.

Pick a category:

1. IndiBlog of the year
2. Best Humanities IndiBlog (IndiBlogs covering Art/Craft/Painting, Hobby, Literature, Poetry/Fiction)
3. Best Entertainment Indiblog (blogs on Music, TV, Movies, theater & fashion)
4. Best Sports IndiBlog
5. Best Science/Technology IndiBlog
6. Best IndiBlog directory/service/clique/network
7. Best Designed IndiBlog (Blogs with original designs or with major visible customizations to existing themes)
8. Best Food/Beverages Indiblog
9. Most Humorous Indiblog
10. Best Indi Podcast/Vidcast
11. Best Travel Indiblog
12. Best New Indiblog (IndiBloggers who began blogging on/after July 1, 2008)
13. Best Photo Indiblog
14. Best Personal Indiblog
15. Best Group/Community Indiblog
16. Best Business Indiblog
17. Best Indi Microblog

Nominate your blogs here: http://nom2008.indibloggies.org/

February 25, 2009

Eat Bong!

3 comments
This is a dish that has been included in traditional Bengali birthday menus, when guests have been over, or as special Sunday lunches or any other occasion that demanded it. Once I started living away from my parents – since 2000 – this was also a MUST each time I visited home.
Read the full story

February 24, 2009

FA-F*****g-Qs and Bollywood dancing...

13 comments
Pic = southasianlife.com
Oh well. I will never, ever review a movie again. I know I stopped doing so ages ago, but just in case I ever think of it again, I will not.

I should have known it, you know, the fact that Slumdog Millionaire would bag the Oscars. It’s a case of history repeating itself. No, no, not any first-slum-movie history, but JB’s-film-reviewing history. It seems that the moment I declare any movie the biggest crap, it goes and sweeps awards.

The first time it happened, I was panned publically – and online – because of my review of Sanjay Leela Bhansali’s scam-for-art, Black. Yes, THAT Black. I had given the movie two-and-a-half stars declaring, ‘It’s bleak for Bhansali’s Black’. It did not matter that Pooja Bhatt and Dipak Tijori wrote/called me to congratulate me on a good review…. As far as the public was concerned, I was way off the mark. Numerous and then some readers and bloggers declared that it was my film reviewing career that was bleak and the bloody movie (I still hate it completely) went on to win Filmfare awards and more.

Another was Bhansali’s Devdas – I didn’t review it, but hated it nonetheless – which also won awards. More recently, I have been asked by EVERY single Australian I’ve met, “What do you think of Slumdog Millionaire?” Most don't really care about what I think; it’s just a convenient conversation-filler. But I have my fun and proceed to bore the person asking that question with e.x.a.c.t.l.y. what I think/thought was wrong about the movie. Now, it goes and wins the Best Movie at the 81st Academy Awards (aka Oscars). I know that am going to have even more people asking me about Slumdog… and India. Sigh. A thought: Do those of us who dislike Slumdog, do so because it's simply not that great a movie or perhaps, because it embarrasses us as Indians? I know I didn't think much of it as a movie, but I am not certain if my reactions don't include a bit of the other emotion as well... Read this.

You know, India seems to confound and confuse most people; Bollywood even more so. I am still trying to understand my own reactions to my country and Bollywood and more so towards what people think of both...

Like this well-meaning bloke asked me, “Does India have arm-wrestling?” EH?! I don't know if I was amused or offended. But the answer would be, no, arm-wrestling is too tribal, India just has world chess grandmasters. Then there are those who demand, “Can you do Bollywood-style dancing?” and proceed to lift their hands in the air and do something that is a cross between bad dancing and bad aerobics. Or ask me, “Show us some Bollywood moves,” and wait with a wicked gleam in their eyes. Well, sorry, no. Firstly, you are not paying me to dance and secondly, you will not be able to. Not when you are smacking of misplaced superiority that is! I've heard there are many non-Indians here who enjoy Bollywood; I'm still to meet any. As for Bollywood dancing, ANY Indian can do it. Even Indians who quote Satyajit Ray and scoff at commercial Hindi cinema know at least one Bollywood dance move. Our 23rd chromosome IS the dancing chromosome.

And now Slumdog has smacked people in the face and Jai ho – which in my view is very, very average Rahman fare – has won best original score. Funny, our average is a global best.

So Hugh Jackman (what a tasty man!) announces “The musical is BACK!” and everyone cheers. Er, I don’t see the excitement because India and Bollywood have been producing musicals for like, ages. Try 1950s. Yet people ask me, “Why does Bollywood have so much singing and dancing?” Because we like to! And we can. Because every Indian state, every 50 kms you travel in the country, has its own dance form. Because as a child, mere me has learnt the Bharatnatyam, Kathak and danced the gidda. Because India has more things to talk about than four versions of Underbelly (Melbourne underworld), Gallipoli (with due respect), the indigenous people (even more respect) or numerous shows on every possible government department (emergency services, firemen, customs, immigration police, trillion cop shows etc)?

So Slumdog wins. While it’s a feather in Danny Boyle’s cap, I wonder if it will translate into anything for Bollywood as an industry. Or will it, perversely, just validate what the world is apparently saying about Indians now: “India and Indian youth have a new-found aggression.” You hear it during cricket commentary, each time the Indian economy is mentioned or even the rise of the Indian middle class. I find it a little irksome. Indians have been always been aggressive; we are global masters at bargaining for a reason. Just that the world has developed new ears I think. Anyway.

Irrespective of what I think of Slumdog, I am really happy for two of my favourite artistes, AR Rahman and Anil Kapoor. The latter hardly had a role in Slumdog and has delivered a winning performance every two-three years.

Here’s my list of favourite Anil Kapoor movies and moments:

  1. Virasat: I love the way he transforms from UK-returned to son-of-the-soil; the scene before the interval where he comes out looking like his father still gives me goose-bumps… Amrish Puri was the best on-screen pairing with Anil I think.
  2. Parinda: it was supposed to be a Nana Patekar movie, but Anil’s vulnerability was unparalled
  3. Ram-Lakhan: hahaha, I love him when he plays the rogue. And that moochie. Again, Amrish Puri!
  4. Nayak: Perhaps not the greatest of movies, but there’s something very earnest about Anil’s character. Yet again, with Amrish Puri.
  5. Tezaab: Ah. The rogue woman-charmer who turns into someone with a burning vengeance. He just fits the role of tapori…
  6. Mr India: “Anil bhaya” at his best. Cute, charming and one of our best attempts at science fiction, if I may!
As for AR Rahman, I am not too crazy about Jai ho or Sayya… but some of his other work is in my list of favourites. Here goes:

  1. Yuva
  2. Roja
  3. Vande Mataram
  4. Rangeela, first hindi music with original score
  5. Rang De Basanti
  6. Swades
  7. Saathiya
  8. Dil se
  9. Bombay, the six tracks he composed
  10. Lagaan
PS: I am still not convinced about Slumdog. But if it could mean we might get Hugh Jackman to come and act – and sing and dance – in Bollywood movies; I am all for it.

Related: Is Slumdog Millionaire a poverty porn?

February 23, 2009

The useless veggie!

0 comments

I am desperately trying to get my daily schedule in some sort of order. The biggest problem is me since I get more easily distracted than a goldfish. I want to write my chapters, write a food blog, write here, keep the house clean, earn some money, do my gardening, paint my nails... I am doing something wrong, somewhere. How do you all manage your time, any tricks? Share?

Meanwhile, this recipe is the result of today's distraction. At least it means dinner is out of the way: "I was quite surprised to discover that eggplant is quite a staple in Australia. Folks even have grilled eggplant in their sandwiches, though I daresay am not exactly partial to begun in my sandwich. You can call it a mental block or cultural difference." Read full post...

February 20, 2009

Introducing: JB goes cooking!

2 comments

I'd announced on Facebook that a food blog was in the offing. Well, here it is! Hope those of you who read here, will read the stories there. Those who like to cook are most welcome to use the recipes and share their own. Here's to pet-bharke-khana.

So, What's Cooking?
"I guess offering to feed people by hand will startle most -- especially here in Australia, they'd insist on gloves -- so I stick to pouring my heart out in my food. Most people who've had my food have liked it. I am grateful to my friends who came home because "Jhoomur is cooking." In my single days, I fed bands of boys. (smiles) They kept me sane."
Read full post

February 19, 2009

Craving for calories

12 comments
<---- Just LOOK at those... they just want to be bitten into.

There has been something seriously missing in my life... at least gastronomically. I've tried everything from croissants, doughnuts, the fraud tandoori chicken that you get here, the simple-yet-tasty Japanese chicken curry (Don Don) and chicken laksa (Laksa King).

Nothing's working!!! :( Everything is just so.... BLAND!

At a restaurant last week, when I asked for my Bloody Mary to be made spicier... I was given a whole bottle of tabasco sauce. WTF??! I might as well have bought my own tin of tomato juice, vodka and chewed on some celery while at it. The restaurant I worked at, the chef made daal and put - choke! - chopped chives in it. Sorry, it was tasty and all, but THAT was not daal. No wonder restaurants here spell it as 'dhal'. My arse.

Then yesterday -- again while watching another documentary on SBS, this one on 'rising India' -- they showed this bloody British bloke chomping away on - gulp! - moong daal pakore and mirchi pakore. "These are so good. Fried chillies, who would have thought of it?" he says. Yessir, bada sahib, a nation of a billion -- and it's neighbours eat it -- but of course if Your Highness has not heard of it, it's not supposed to exist.

I WANT MY BHAJIYA!!!

I don't care about pavloas, I want pakore. Fuck the tiramisu, gimme tikki any day. And gol-gappe at Nathu's. Here I put like two, little black peppercorns in my daal and people go, "My god that's hot." Arre, what bloody hot! No jalebees either and it is a national insult to call those things-that-come-in-tins as rasgullas.

My life is ruined. Partner better make up for it. :(

My current fantasy list includes:
1. Jalebee that I had at India Today office: Karol Bagh, Jhandewalan

2. Mirchi pakode: from anywhere

3. Gol gappe: always Nathu's...and please, the real ones are not called water balls (scoff)

4. Aloo tikki: Sarojini Nagar, after loads of shopping while jostling with other women

5. Pyaz parantha: Moolchand, mere pyaare Moolchand paranthe...

6. Kulcha-chana @ Rs 5: outside the Times of India office, ITO...

7. Bhel puri: For Rs 7/- outside LSR, he just knew how to make it

8. Kaala-khatta: the joy of slurping, South Ex part 2

9. Aloo-chaat: as you enter Noida from Kalindi Kunj side, there are these dudes who make fried
potato chaat in tins, with three other tin scraps to keep the wind out. Oh lord, divine.

10. Samose followed by gulab jamun: at Ber Sarai, even Partner misses them.

11. Bread pakore: again India today office, Karol Bagh, Jhandewalan...really oily, really unhealthy, but bloody good for the taste buds.

12. Meetha paan: only and only from Prince Paan Bhandar, GK 1. Partner never understood my fascination for paan. He has no appreciation for the good things in life.

Oh my life is ruined.

PS: Am hungry, what to eat? A sandwich. Wow.

February 18, 2009

Blood, beats and the rhythm of rage

12 comments

Some coincidences in life are funny.

On Monday night, while watching Media Watch, host Jonathan Holmes made me re-think my reaction to SRS (henceforth You-Know-Who). He was blasting off an Australian journalist for her ‘opinion’ column where she suggests beating up members of a political party because she didn’t agree with their opinions. Holmes’ exact quote, “That’s not opinion…that’s hate mongering.” It was pretty much what I had written in the gadha post. It made me re-think my reaction. Even though we are justified in our anger towards You-Know-Who, violence-against-violence is NOT the answer. What then is the answer to fear, frustration, anger and a sense of persecution?

The answer came through a series of coincidences…

Partner was out for an official dinner last night – read, bingeing with the blokes – and I was sitting at home with a massive headache. After losing the throne of Therebor and being beaten by the hordes of Mordor for the eighth time (Xbox 360, The Battle for Middle Earth II), I took my hurt ego and hurting fingers to watching some TV. Now Special Broadcasting Service (SBS) is one of the best channels here. It shows really good documentaries and it’s the only channel that gives equal representation to the multicultural Australia… Australians, Indians, Koreans, Indigenous; it has ‘mixed’ reporters/news readers. So last evening, I came across a documentary on Rio de Janeiro; rather the favelas – shanty towns aka slums – of Rio. It was the drums and music along with the images of dancing, bedraggled children that made me sit up.

It was like looking at Mumbai’s Dharavi again… plastic and human refuse, thatched huts that look like an ugly, mismatched mosaic in aerial shots, dogs and children generally lying around, poverty… and corrupt, corrupt police. While Rio creates images of exotic holidays for most – ignorant me included – there is a prevalent drug culture there. A drug-gang culture. To combat the drug-gangs, Rio has the military police, which can even put Delhi/Mumbai police to shame with its corruption and ruthlessness. If we hear about fake ‘encounter killings’ in Mumbai, the Polícia Militar (literally, military police) – under the garb of flushing out drug-gangsters – is also known to shoot innocent people at “point blank range”… often wrongfully. Or perhaps intentionally, no one can stop them.

The documentary was called ‘Favela Rising’ and was about the Grupo Cultural AfroReggae. Who are AfroReggae?

“…a Brazilian cultural group from Rio de Janeiro. Forged out of the police massacre of 21 people in their local community in 1993, they have gone on to establish an international profile for their pioneering work in taking young people out of the drug/gang culture of Rio de Janeiro’s favelas (shantytowns).”

It’s a cultural group that takes on the police and the drug gangs through… Music. Their songs talk of politics, murder, police, drugs and they dance their desire for life. AfroReggae strongly believes that “hatred breeds violence”. It was stuff out of movies, only this was not fiction: The sheer will power of one man – Anderson Sá, former drug dealer and the man who started AfroReggae in 1995 in the favela, Vigário Geral – to move people, to make a difference. As Anderson’s fiancé says in the documentary, “He is so determined to save the world, he does not think about himself.”

Because, like us, Anderson was and is, pissed off.

21 people assassinated by the police
Our people killed by luck of draw
Hatred breeds violence, I’ve had enough
Yet my pride still resides in Vigario
I love my community
But I’m pissed off.

From the song, I’m Pissed Off, AfroReggae

The people in the favela don’t blame anyone. As one old man said, “We don’t blame the government anymore. We realise that the society, people, the police, religion, us….we all have to do something if we want things to change.” Much like blaming LK Advani, Sonia Gandhi, the gaping economic chasm, Hindiusm and Islam or the billion-plus population of India will not help.

It’s like taking a crap: if you don’t wash your bum, no one else will wash it for you. Or wipe it (Australia, toilet papers here!)

Whether it is media-mongering thugs like You-Know-Who or roadside eve teasers. Blank Noise Project does it’s own peaceful thing for handling eve-teasers… Bangalore-based rock band Thermal And A Quarter (TAAQ) are doing their bit for tackling You-Know-Who and other similar death eaters. The newsletter from TAAQ was the other coincidence. I was sitting and watching videos of AfroReggae on YouTube when G-talk announced a new mail.

“…it’s time to unlock our chords, vocal and all. For nearly a month, Bangalore has been rocked by a big protest against the self-appointed moral police. While mostly everybody was throwing hate back at the hate-mongers, we came up with our strongest response: One Small Love. This unusual protest song is about making a difference through random acts of love – to unexpected people, in unexpected places, in unexpected ways…”
You can hear One Small Love here and can download it here. Check out AfroReggae’s MySpace page as well…it doesn’t matter if you don’t understand the language. Dance along.

CNN-IBN journalist DP Satish wrote on his blog that the best way to deal with You-Know-Who is to not give them publicity. While it is a good idea to not give them any hype, it will be silly to not discuss the issue. We will not make such issues or such people go away by not discussing them. The idea is to KNOW, so that we know how to react. While the media and bloggers did provide You-Know-Who with a global platform, they also informed people. Perhaps the next time those at the receiving end will be better prepared. Perhaps instead of just one man speaking out against You-Know-Who and other death eaters, more will stand up and refuse to let them have their way.

So many people making themselves heard and reacting is a good sign. Perhaps eventually, we will not need help wiping/washing our bums. And if what it takes is singing and dancing to the rhythm of rage, so be it.

Disclaimer: This blog/post does not in any way seek to infringe any copyright of JK Rowling or the Harry Potter trademark. Just in case her lawyers decide to sue the blog owner, the use of You-Know-Who and ‘death eaters’ is duly attributed to JK Rowling. Thank-you for a phrase that describes evil so well, even though there is nothing magical about these evils. As a gesture of good will, the blog owner will soon be buying Tales of Beedle the Bard as well.

PS 1: Thank-you for the comments on the previous post....despite the numbers who end up reading this blog, not many react or interact. That is fine! Even if you choose not to comment, it would be nice if you pass on the One Small Love link to friends and people. Tks!

PS 2 : Check this out as well….LOVE the music.
See the
AfroReggae in action, click on the video.

February 12, 2009

Dekho gadha moot raha hai...

26 comments
I have no idea why I started thinking about that, y'know, the phrase in the headline. In English it would mean, 'Look a donkey is pissing.'

The whole idea of writing it on walls -- apparently to dissuade Indian men from marking their territories/ walls/ parks/ benches with their piss -- is to shame them into not pee-ing in public. BUT given that more than half the Indian population cannot read, what's the point? As for the laptop-toting brigade that pulls over their Santros and Toyota's and pisses on the wall, perhaps they can't read Hindi.

Hello, Sri Ram Sene, are you listening? How about a campaign eh? We can call it -- Bharat Maata Moot-Rahit Campaign (Mother India Piss Free)-- where your goons, er, cadets can beat up men who pee on Mother India's pavements and walls? What do you say? Ma par mootna nahi chahiye, Hinduism says so.

For those who don't know what I am talking about: Sri Ram Sene is a supposedly 1000-strong (has anyone really checked?) group of staunch Hindu men who go around attacking pubs, punching and slapping women for doing non-Indian/Hindu things like drinking and dancing. Sri Ram Sene ji... what about Bhole Nath/ Shivshankar/ Nataraj/ Shiva? We ALL know he is associated with dancing. AND what about the bhaang (cannabis) that is legally sold through government shops on Holi? Men AND women drink it and get absolutely friggin' high and do all sorts of things.

OHO!! Bhagwan Krishna -- hare Rama, hare Krishna anyone? -- is KNOWN to have danced with all the gopis in Vrindavan. Why were you not around back then Sri Ram Sene... to control him? Ah, and the dandiya during Diwali where young girls and boys dance with each other... Are we going to get them married? I suggest we do, statistics show that we have a rise in pregnancies during the dandiya season. Of course you, Sri Ram Sene, know that babies are not created just by dancing with sticks. The timing would be perfect, there's nothing more auspicious than Diwali time, no?

Sri Ram Sene says pubs, Valentine's Day, drinking and dancing with boys (and boys dancing with girls) is all anti-Hindu and anti-India. SRS also says that Muslims are anti-India and of course anti-Hindu... Sri Ram Sene has released statements saying "those women were with boys of a different religion".

"They are trying to spread a rumour that I am a Muslim but I am not a Muslim. My name is Pawan Shetty," said the Mangalore hero.


But SRS, please, given the economic crisis that the world is facing, let's just hold on to the Muslim persecution for a while. We need the money and we need some glory.

Like Yousuf and Irfan Pathan gave Sri Lanka a solid beating two days back and we (India through ICC, ostensibly) earned a lot of money through the IPL series. And of course, a week back it was the mixed doubles pair of Mahesh Bhupathi and Sania Mirza (psst, Muslim) that got us the Australian Open Mixed Doubles award. Not to mention... if we remove Shah Rukh KHAN, Aamir KHAN, Saif Ali KHAN and Salman KHAN from the Hindi film industry aka Bollywood, the industry collapses. Hai na?

While Sri Ram Sene is busy, I sincerely hope, targeting the Khans -- who strangely never, ever say a word when it's needed -- I have a question for everyone. Especially those who are sending chaddies (panties) and what not to SRS. I understand the idea behind sending chaddis - one nonsense for another nonsense -- but is that enough?

This is about FEAR tactics where a group of thugs is scaring people through violence... whatever be their purported reason. It's about Gabbar Singh in the name of Ram.

"...The report also says that a fear-psychosis prevails among youngsters in the city and with Valentine’s Day coming up, the panic is palpable..."

I mean, if it's pink versus khaaki...why not a laat (kick) versus a chaanta (slap)? If 28-odd men could beat up a few women, why not the other way round? Why was there only ONE man with balls enough to stand up against them? Apparently the chaddi-club has 486 confirmed guests and there are 24, 990 (still counting on Facebook) plus members on another group for 'pub-going, loose and forward women'.

Someone mentioned that this -- the panties-for-perverts -- is like the Gandian non-violent movement. Sure, applaud. But can anyone deny that the extremists in the Indian freedom movement -- the men and women who blew up offices, rail lines and gave us an eye-for-an-eye -- did not contribute to the freedom of India as well?

How about a 50-strong group of men and women taking up the cause? The idea is to give out the same kind of justice. Laaton ke bhooth, baaton -- aur chaddi -- se nahi maante.

On New Year's eve, two women WITH their husbands are disrobed. The year before that another girl faces a similar fate. Rizwanur Rehman's murder is STILL being investigated and now a senior police office-turned-witness has been found murdered in EXACTLY THE SAME way. STILL no solutions... HOW much longer before those reading this blog and other blogs and joining Facebook groups is going to lose someone close because of something like this? Panties will not stop it. Neither will Renuka Chowdhary. A good beating might just.

Someone give answers please.

PS: Am I being 'intolerant'? Perhaps so. But some itches you've got to scratch, tickling them doesn't really help.

A brilliant, brilliant post
It was pretty fashionable for women to wear sleeveless blouses in the 60's. Once, on a bus, a bunch of young men took razor blades and slashed the exposed arms of women in such blouses. Overnight, it seemed, women stopped wearing them.

Related stories:
Can't drink to India culture: Women attacked in Mangalore pub
Moral policing: ABVP protests pub culture
Sri Ram Sene men get bail
Pub attack: Govt sends enquiry team
Man who fought pub attackers threatened
Pink underwear against moral police

February 6, 2009

I love to lick...and other things!

7 comments
This tag -- the first tag I am responding to! -- was insisted upon by Koshy, MaxJayJay, Catmeister and Mamma Mia.

Rules: Once you've been tagged, you are supposed to write a note with 25 random things, facts, habits, or goals about you. At the end, choose 25 people to be tagged. You have to tag the person who tagged you. If I tagged you, it's because I want to know more about you.

(I am doing this on my blog BUT: (To do this, go to “notes” under tabs on your profile page, paste these instructions in the body of the note, type your 25 random things, tag 25 people (in the right hand corner of the application).

Despite having an entire blog to myself... 25 random things about me:

1. I cannot remember jokes or rather, can only remember one joke at a time, which I will repeat at every party. Current joke involves a Chihuahua and a female elephant. Those interested, shout out!

2. I don’t like men with hairless arms. Hairless chests, is okay, hairless arms….pfft (thus I cannot stand Rafael Nadal)

3. I hate four-boobs…when you wear a wrong-sized bra and the top of your breasts pop out…thus, four boobs. I consider it the biggest faux pas.

4. I am extremely uncomfortable with compliments, to the point of being rude. I think people are lying when they compliment, especially when it’s about physical appearance. In the same vein, I am even worse when I am criticised. (wicked grin)

5. I LOVE my boobs. Bwahaha.

6. I have an authority-issue…sooner or later I will hate/dislike my boss.

7. If I was assured I will not be caught, there are at least two people I can murder without any conscience. I think I will make a good assassin.

8. If I could Ctrl+Z… I would've remain a virgin till my wedding day/night. Oh well. Go figure.

9. Despite others being the ‘cause’ of the heartbreak…it has always been me who has walked out of a relationship(s)

10. I have kissed a friend’s boyfriend. :( I consider it one of the shittiest things I have done and will never forgive myself for it.

11. I use a tongue cleaner…Partner thinks its weird, but without it I feel unclean.

12. I like licking -- using my fingers that is! -- the bottom of the pan when certain dishes have been cooked. ‘Kadhi’ and Maggi top the list.

13. I used to chew my nails to little, bitty pieces. Now I do it only when I am EXTREMELY excited (does not include sex). I still consider my nails as rather, er, chewable. Hah. (thank god they don’t have nicotine in them! alarmed)

14. I get extremely uncomfortable and possessive -- I actually throw a tantrum and can lose my temper -- with anyone else working/ using my kitchen. Especially if it’s another woman, even if it’s my mother. (!)

15. I used to be VERY particular about everyone using MY name…no nicknames, no shortcuts, just Jhoomur. Now I am not as Nazi about it… (hmmm…maybe I need to be. If people can pronounce Dostoevsky they can bloody well pronounce my name)

16. I would love to give a dance performance before an audience and receive rave reviews for it. The last was when I was 13 -- Bharatnatyam -- before the then-Vice President of India. Dr SD Sharma, at Siri fort auditorium, New Delhi.

17. I would love, love, LOVE to have a horse as a pet.

18. I would love to tango/ salsa with Partner… REAL steamily. However, this will probably go unfulfilled -- learning dance is anathema to Partner -- unless we can salsa to the tunes of market movements and barley figures.

19. I would really like to get married… at a time when I and the other mean our vows. To just KNOW that I am loved, as I am. And I would consider myself blessed to have a baby, my baby. My child. My existence. I already love him/her…it’s weird.

20. I fervently wish to take my parents out of the country…make them see the world. Papa loves reading and watching National Geographic…I want to see the look on his face when he steps on to the lands he reads about… for Ma, I want to buy her everything she wants. Anything, everything and remove every, single, teensy, vestige of the childhood -- where they took everything from her -- or her youth -- where she gave everything to us.

21. I find the idea of threesomes (yes, that threesome) scary. :P No, I haven’t.

22. My biggest, biggest crush was a man at least 22 years my senior. He was one of the cruellest men I knew. He never hurt me though. Funny.

23. I can ‘read’ other peoples’ relationships. Whether pretending to be happy or whatever, I have NEVER been wrong in reading relationships. Except mine!

24. If I could choose between becoming a vampire or a werewolf, I’d choose to be a vampire (love the clothes) … who can mate with werewolves. :D Go Lycans!

25. I find it very hard completing tags…simply because it feels like an editor telling me what to do…goes against the grain!

(26... I really, really miss my Golu.)
People who I tag:
1.Mamma Mia
3. MaxJayJay
7. Mad Momma
11. Sree
The other names are on the Facebook note...

The object of my (des) ire

4 comments
"Do you ever get tired of thinking?" read the comment. No.

It's involuntary, like breathing. Inhale thought, let it mix in the blood stream, pump through the arteries, convolute in the veins and exhale out. In notebooks, on napkins, on the margins of whichever page of whatever book the eyes are on, behind book covers; sometimes here.

Some thougths are triggered by a song, a scene, a scheme. Some are like the past, with a subconcious claim over my dreams. The purest of those thoughts, those dreams are fuzzy... I don't know how to consciously create them. Like you can consciously create a day-dream where everything is geared to make you come out the winner. To make you happy. Day-dreaming and cynicism are mutually exclusive.

The clearest thoughts/dreams involve pain. Hurting others. A departure from reality, where always, I am the one left curled up, tired to cry, hoarse to scream. With such a tremendous pressure on the chest, it feels the heart will disintegrate and pour out of my mouth in a bloody vomit. Each droplet out like acid splattering on another's face. Burning through their skin, eating into their brain. Demanding reasons, retribution, revenge. Justice.

But justice is overrated, poetic justice befuddled. And revenge is like your own personal rancid rainbow -- of reeking reds and gory greens -- that you can run to, but never touch. So you run from it. You think you are "letting go". But the scarlet-tinged, fluoro colours are always, always there in your peripheral vision. Mocking. "You idiot! Others are reaping the rewards of your hurt. Of your heart. Ha, ha."

I don't get tired of thinking. But I tire of repetitive thoughts with no results. Of a clingy past that I cannot shake off. Because I cannot seem to stop remembering. How do I let go? ... Or how do I hurt? Because sometimes, so many times, I really don't want to hurt. I WANT to give it back.

And if that makes me a bad person, guess I am like everybody else.

Saw pseudo-vampire flick Twilight last evening. Pseudo because they have no fangs, just strong teeth. More a horse than vampire I say. Hrmph. Have read all four books by Stephenie Meyer. It's a teen romance masquerading as a vampire flick/book. So S.L.O.W. Kristen Stewart looks constantly constipated, Robert Pattison looks anemic (well, he's a 'vegetarian' vampire, snigger) and there's zero chemistry between the two. The books are a cruel joke. My translation: A perfect man is only possible if he's a vampire, i.e. a work of fiction. Hah. Read the books if you have to, give the movie a miss. Partner either groaned or yawned through it all. But at least we are even; four history documentaries against one chick-flick.

Came back home and saw Korean director Chan-wook Park's Sympathy for Lady Vengeance. Loved the movie. Completely empathised with Geum-ja Lee... what if vengeance does not liberate? What if it doesn't shake off the past? DO see the movie. It's black.
PS: This doesn't make any sense does it? Good. It's still my blog you know.


Curious co-relation between the two movies? Tofu. 'Edward Cullen' says surviving on animal blood is like living on tofu, does the job but never satisfies you. Lady Vengeance has tofu too... it signifies purity of soul. But never satisfies?