*NEW* Recent blog entries

January 17, 2008

Introducing... Eve's Ears

Hello Everyone,
A new format had been promised on Eve* and this would be the first in the series. The thought-exchanging will continue but hopefully, we will see, hear and read more of other Eves here. Or Sita, Radha, Mary Magdalene, or whoever or whatever you want to call Her.

I was still thinking about what to name this series when ‘Eve’s Lungs’ popped up in the pic-map tool. Not this Eve*’s lungs – since those are all smoke now – but another Eve in Kolkata. It sealed the nomenclature for this series, thank-you for the inspiration.

Meet… Eve’s Ears. I met her first at work… Rather was ‘introduced’ by the other girls. They were standing beside her chair, gesturing and saying funny/ nasty things about her, right behind her back. I was puzzled: How can you bitch about someone standing inches behind them? That’s when one of the girls said, “Don’t worry, she can’t hear a thing, don’t you see the hearing aid she wears?” Eve was born with a serious hearing impairment and today plugs in a hearing aid to listen properly. She still can’t and often people in office will be screaming out her name, rolling their eyes when she does not respond instantly and then get bitchy RIGHT BEHIND her ears… or hearing aids.

Eve also does not speak very good English, but that does not daunt her. She does not have too many friends as, “People don’t have the maturity to understand,” but that does not daunt her. She knows people laugh at her, but that does not daunt her. Instead she is one of the most pleasant people to work with, never says no to extra work, respects personal space, does not make judgments AND does not take crap from anyone.

We had a little Q& A session and I am writing Eve’s interview out as a first-person account. In days when I get nervous by the acidic comments that come my way and when people call me ‘different’ and different names, I look up from my desk and there she is… happily sitting and finishing her work.

Meet one of the strongest women I know…


Eve’s Ears: Shubh-shubh bolo

I come from a Hindu-Punjabi family, originally from Gurdaspur (Punjab), but I was born and brought up in Delhi. I studied in the same school from nursery to class 12 and it was one of the best schools of Delhi. I was born with a serious hearing problem and by the time I was 2-years-old, my parents were struggling to find a good speech therapy school for me and am very glad they didn't put me in any ‘special school’ and did not insist that I learn ‘sign language’…

You know, the moment you learn ‘sign language’ it sort of ‘categorises’ you as special and different and I am grateful that my parents thought about it. So I grew up learning to ‘talk’ and hear as ‘normal’ people. School was fun but there were never many friends. No, I don’t blame them… We were all kids and kids as you know, are immature, so it’s okay that I didn’t have too many friends. Two of my closest friends though – I have one from college – are friends I made in school and they have stuck for life, so it really does not matter.

Apart from the hearing problem, I am pretty normal, I would say! I love cooking, painting, dancing and aerobics… In fact I was the Vice President of the Aerobics Association at my college, Lady Shri Ram College for Women. Oh yes, I also love shopping and usually blow my money on clothes, shoes and bags. Beyond that, it does not take much to make me happy; some sweet words from people can make my day. I love traveling too, whether with my parents or with office people. Where would I go if I got a fully-paid trip? London of course, simply because that city is beautiful and scenic and there are many Indians there (apne log hain).

Life is about working hard for me because my father always told me that it’s important to be independent. He never ‘hid’ me or stopped me from venturing out alone. My family gave me confidence. The happiest day in my life was when I got this job as a designer – February 20, 2006 – my father was so proud of me and said, “Now my daughter can stand on her own two feet.” It inspires me to keep working hard and not be cowed by anything anyone says or does.

My parents and my boss keep me going and someday I hope I will be like my boss: Someone who knows her job well and yet is humane enough to think about the welfare of her workers. You know, a boss is like a parent in office, s/he guides you, teaches you things, makes you capable of facing the world and looks out for you. That’s the kind of boss I would like to be someday. Maybe a creative manager in some company…

Till then, I will keep my head down and simply work, even if it’s extra work. After all, extra work will only make me better at my job, no? And that’s very important for me, because for me and every other girl out there, I think it’s necessary that we be independent that we be able to look after ourselves. How does it matter what other people say? If you have been sent here by God, it is our duty to ensure that we can face ourselves in the mirror, that we know what our own worth is. And I know my worth.

When dealing with people: Always be polite, it always works. If you are impolite, it will only make you feel bitter at the end of the day.

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

This is good.The new approach.Giving voice to other Eve's.But calling everyone Eve is confusing me.

Other Eve:The people who mock at you are living with the biggest problem called ignorance.And their intelligence made a choice to embrace being absolute stupids,when they were born with a choice to be a good brain as well.When you boss around one day,you're gonna rock as much as you do today and more.

And I like sayin this:You go girl!

Mystique said...

yes, the eves are confusing....
and it is sad that people take advantage of the other eve's hearing problem by bitching....but it is good that she doesn't know and doesn't care what they say.

Anonymous said...

Mystique... she knows and reads this blog too. Howeve, she is brave enough to NOT let it bother her.

Crimson Feet said...

this was wonderful jbo... the idea is grt too.

she does sound like a really nice and strong person, and has a great attitude to life... thats all that matters...

i wish people understood and loved other people more easily than misunderstanding and disliking them... its like, our default setting of how to react to a stranger/person u 'dont know very well' is, to doubt/avoid/dislike/'do nasty things to' etc...

why cant it be wow/grt/another beautiful person/'another wonderful life to learn from and share with' ...

i wish her all the best !!

btw.. miss original eve... i think this thought is grt and worth applying in life everyday..

"When dealing with people: Always be polite, it always works. If you are impolite, it will only make you feel bitter at the end of the day."

what say?

Jhoomur aka JB said...

(clears throat) Crimson beta, arrrrrrrrrrrre you trying to tell ME something? (wicked grin)

Anonymous said...

This is a great book.'The Unheard' by Josh Swiller.

http://www.joshswiller.com/meetjosh.html

Anonymous said...

I am sure she doesnt think its a big deal... I know cause I am a hearing impaired person myself.

Nice to know there are other women who handle a 'handicap' for what it is... just a handicap, just like one wears prescription glasses.

YAY!!! to such and her likes!