*NEW* Recent blog entries

July 30, 2007

Baby, I love you, I’ll cheat on you

So everyone is cheating on everyone, or almost everyone. And as usual – rather as some have suggested – this again might be one of those things I seem to be the only one to realize bloody late. Or at least the magnitude of it.

Fidelity, it seems, is fast going out of fashion. And it does not matter whether it’s the guy who is cheating or the girl, whether it’s an old relationship or a recent one, whether it’s marriage or living in. It’s almost becoming fashionable to say you have a roving eye, and if given a chance – then there are those who create the chance – there’d be more than your eye that would do the roving.

So they are recently married after substantial years of courtship. Now since I have been unable to manage any relationship beyond two years – yes, it does say something about me and that the men perhaps were not to blame all the time, but since this is my blog and my perspective, we shall say it’s always the men’s fault, okay? – so basically, in my blook/blog, anything that is more than two years is substantial. They had been courting well beyond the five-year mark. And then they got married, it should have been a happy union, a culmination of long years of dating, wherein we suppose, like all other couples, they too had their teething troubles. So they overcame all that and got married. And now she has met someone recently and their chemistry is undeniable. She has already spoken to her parents; while she waits to break the news to the man she is married to.

So almost a decade of togetherness can be abandoned for two months of zing? Or does it run deeper? Was it that while the courtship lasted it was easy, and once the marriage proved tough, you want out? Or did he change and does the new one offer something that is now missing in the earlier relationship? Or is it simply hormones?

And there is Her, out of one relationship of convenience and into another relationship of convenience, conveniently having declared in both cases that it would last as far it can, without much investment of emotion or time. So she spends an entire evening flashing another man. Incidentally, the skirt she wore was comfortably knee-length, no way for your fucking panties – or perhaps she was commando? – to flash if you fucking keep your legs closed. And of course I am pissed because it was well, someone I knew who was being flashed. Go flash your own fucking boyfriend.

Of course there’s him who declared that he cannot stop eyeing women. Actually he cannot stop doing those he eyes either, but he accepts that he has a trust issue and an eye issue. Actually his problem is neither, he just keeps thinking that there is something better for him out there. Like so many others who keep looking…

Or he, who challenged norms and rules to be with her. The envy of every other couple, two people who seemed to have it perfect; till he met another and decided this was his soulmate. But they are together, and there are tender moments. Did she stick by him? Did he see sense? Are they both compromising because they are too used to each other?

And there’s them. Both have cursed each other to the sky, both have declared that They were the worst thing to happen to the other. Both have spent a considerable time breaking up and making out. In one of the breaking-up periods, he went and screwed everything he could screw. She thinks he did it when they were together. Now he says he is a one-woman-man, she says she is a one-man-woman too. They are not dating anymore. Neither will answer as to why then are they still, ‘together’. She fears the answer perhaps, he has never been known to volunteer information and usually lies when asked direct. Their togetherness now is perhaps convenience (there’s the word again) or an inability to find someone who’d understand their quirks – they did tolerate a lot from each other when they were together. Or just a fear of loneliness and a stop-gap till either finds another or either has really had enough? Who knows, they don’t for sure. Meanwhile, he checks out the girls he likes. And she counts everyday he hasn’t found another as a small, short-lived, over-anytime blessing.

Oh before I forget, there’s also them, the star couple, they live together. But she has a thing for having a thing for people who are doing well… she even asks him if it’s okay to kiss another. He meanwhile is pretty liberal but has a set of ethics, which are interesting but hard to decipher. She must have cheated on him, for I don’t see him as a cheat; but he did with another. Why? Was he hurting? Is their relationship an ‘open’ one? He seems to care for her, does it not matter then whether they are loyal to each other?

Or am I the only idiot feeling a little worried and a whole lot scared by all this. Love and lust have become like a buy-one-get-the-other-free offer. Relationships seem to come with an attachment or pre-signed agreement of “I will do what and who I want” from both sides. So I hear and am told that it has been happening for AGES… but at least there were some who didn’t do it, who held the other and what they have as sacrosanct. Now, everyone seems to be happily sleeping around.

What ees happening?

PS: Why the fuck am I worrying about fidelity though, am supposedly bloody single.


Still searching said...

I know man!! Its like no one can be trusted anymore!!! I mean, there's no one who seems to think fidelity is important! And makes you bloody scared about what will happen when u're married and wondering if your husband is doing someone else when he's supposedly in office working late! Maybe I'm being paranoid too, and there are still people who value fidelity.... or maybe not...

I was recently talking to my aunt whose been in the US for many years and she was asking me whether ur generation in India has now become used to infidelity as well, apart from other Western influences.. and I wasn't sure whether to say yes, like it is, or try to show a better picture and lie!

nitin said...

this calls for an orgy! hahaha

but on the real, not everyone is cheating - its slightly biased to say or think otherwise.

When you find true love all the pieces fall into place - awww aint that fuckin sweet?!


i feel that one partner's paranoia leads to the other partner getting fed up and looking for something a bit more chilled out. So now the question i pose is this, what does one have to do to build so much trust that cheating won't even come into the picture?

please don't turn around and say 'a big dick'!



Anonymous said...

They cheat on each other because the relationship is perfect....and when somethings perfect we as human beings just feel compelled to fuck it up...its all about the drama...

U dont want no Drama...hahaha!...where them humps???