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April 6, 2009

Baapre, baby?!

Mothers are like politicians. Their ideologies change according to their point of view; rather when they want you to agree to their p.o.v.

At 13, my mother's pet phrase was, "Don't think about makeup, don't even think of thinking about boys, only concentrate on your studies."
I wondered about Doogie Howser and when I'd have my first kiss...

At 18, she would say, "Not all cosmetics are bad. That fairness cream would not hurt you, it also clears pimples. And please don't think about boys/men right now, concentrate on your studies and finish college first."
I wondered if being dark was the reason I didn't have a 'steady' boyfriend or maybe it was because I was not slim...

At 24, she started saying, "Why don't you wear some lipstick? It adds colour to your face. If you keep your head buried in books, life will pass you by. Here, look at this boy's photo at least; finding the right one takes time you know..."
I wondered if I would find someone who didn't mind me smoking, or who didn't try to control me, who would understand me and who I didn't have to dump...

At 27, she would insist, "Are you applying that herbal face mask I told you about? Smoking has made your lips black and is killing your skin and hair. Think about your father and me, all our friends' children are settled. Do you at least have a man in your life? We will be happy with that. But don't do anything that will get you pregnant ok? "
I wondered what was "anything"... and if everything had to be about love, marriage and how it was all bullshit anyway because all bastards cheated on you.

A month-short-of-30, last evening she said, "Beta, age is passing you by. How long will you wait? I don't mind if you have a baby and marry later; the biological clock does not wait you know."

I am wondering: Do all mothers do such an about turn in a matter of 17 years...

PS: And does it hurt when your children make you do such about-turns? Cartoon courtesy: See Mike Draw

11 comments:

~nm said...

Just loved this.. :D

Eve* aka JB said...

@ NM: not from where i am standing! (horrified) :)

Eveline said...

LOL!! wonder how mothers who've never met each other are so friggin alike! Maybe there's a secret manual somewhere. ;P

Eve* aka JB said...

@ Eveline: Yeah, the Indian Mummys' Motherhood Manual.

Sree said...

beta..is tht the reason why u dont have a clock at home.and why are u cooking when ur hand isnt well.they take international credit cards to deliver food y knw.r u still smoking????
hehe.

Kartikey said...

JB,
Maybe it works both ways :-)
But somewhere I feel such about-turns could be heart-breaking for the 'child'.
Better we spell out everything in any relationship...in time. And not make things look sacrificial.

Goofy Mumma said...

Its just a matter of how we think JB. I completely understand what you say. Its just that in India parents think of their kids only in their own context, and don't think of them as separate, unique individuals. And hence all the expectations, and wants, and so forth. So the terrible pressure on the child as well as teh parent. happy I managed to break the damn cycle.I hope this makes sense.

flygye12 said...

1) so DO you have a boy in ur life? ;)

2) the photo in the title bar- is that a shoulder? :O

Megha said...

Nicely done!

Sree said...

yay! museek is back!!

Eve* aka JB said...

@ Sree: Hand hurts most in the morning, it hurts only mildly by late afternoon. No clock because I cant be bothered putting in new batteries; there's a digital clock on cellphone and computer, no?

@ Kartikey: Psychoanalysis kya?

@ Goofy Mumma: I am still conflicted about what's a better way to bring up kids. The overly involved parents like we have in India or the let-them-by-themselves that I see in Australia. I can see positives and negatives in both...

@ Flygye: 1. Yes! :) 2. Guess?

@ Megha: thanks.