Let's mate, date and f*****g celebrate!

Today, one of the lines in my horoscope said: Your pessimistic attitude might be on the rise again; however since you don't know the future, there are equal chances for things turning out right rather than turning out wrong. Hmm.

Tell me something: How bad or tough can it get when two people in any given situation/association/ relationship, REALLY decide to make it work? I have often wondered, and me thinks have written about it earlier too, that I really don't understand why two intelligent, sensitive, like-each-other people cannot have a relationship that lasts or works out. And no, am not talking about walking down the altar. I am talking about being with someone and being happy. I am happy. Eight days and growing happier, but HELL, I am HAPPY. Reason? New person in life. And that's all I am gonna say.

Yes, I did say no more trying etc, but hey... I have also been called a fool, an opportunist and a hopeless romantic at other times. I am simply cognizant of a good thing and cherishing it. Of course I am scared... but if there is no fear, one can get complacent, no?

So you, we, me have been hurt before, the scars remain. "How can you get the strength to try again?" someone else had said sometime back. And I had said, "Because I WANT to." And at times, you want to try because of the person... because they share their warmth, love, affection and softness with you and you want to give back equally and cherish too. But then, if we constantly keep reopening old wounds, do they really ever heal? Perhaps not, some things simply come back or make you more cautious or haunt you for long. However, there could be moments in life, instances and circumstances where you meet people who make it all seem worthwhile. You want to close your eyes, sigh in relief and say, "Ah, I don't have to be on my guard now."

I have a request for all those who might be reading this…. Will you PLEASE treat the person in your life right? It changes so, so many things when there’s someone in your life who… How do I explain it? It simply makes you beam all over the place, feel confident about who you are and can be and makes you a better person. Because you know that there is SOMEONE who likes you for who you are… It’s just SUCH a nice break from trying to count your negativities and figuring how the fuck you can rid yourself of those.

There are the nasty boys and the beastie boys, but nothing beats a man who is GOOD to his woman. I mean how much does it take?

In fact, it’s so SIMPLE being good to another person that I am aghast. It’s like… If it was this easy, WHY was I treated badly? Why do so many take shit, men and women alike? Many need a little appreciation for who they are, what they might do for you, what they mean to you… It doesn’t take too much time. One well-placed comment will make another’s entire day brilliant. “You are very efficient in the kitchen,” he said… and I was glad he noticed. Just glad that cooking for someone was not a wasted effort. Or a lingering glance. Or a casual touch. At times, after a bad day or a tiring day, all you want to do is to be HELD close and take in the other's fragrance and feel yourself rejuvenated. It's just so relieving.

Umm… like I had stopped grinning in my pictures because I thought I looked ugly, in fact I was told so. Suddenly, it does not matter. I can GRIN, show my buckteeth, wink on camera and not give two hoots. Why? Because someone does not mind how I look when I grin. In fact someone finds me gorgeous… G.O.R.G.E.O.U.S. (Say it loud to yourself girl, you are not going to hear it everyday!) It really does not matter then, if the other looks/appreciates someone else…because YOU know what you mean to that person. You feel secure. (Eight days, keep repeating to self woman, eight days) And that's what I try and understand about other men: I guess we all look at someone/something that is appealing, but does it have to be at the cost of making your partner feel inadequate?

I am just overwhelmed. Kindness took it's time to come to me. Somewhere I feel like an abandoned pup that has now been adopted and is now being petted and loved and cuddled and played with and has her tummy scratched. And I want to say THANKYOU… for treating me like a human being.

Man! We ALL crave affection, WHY the fuck don’t we give it around then? And suddenly there is a very scary thought… what if all men DON’T cheat? What if I find someone who doesn’t and who… likes me back? Then?

And I am praying... all those who are hurting out there, lonely, tired, wanting a hug, a little smile, words that say that it's okay to be an idiot... I hope there are at least some moments, even if transitory that make you truly happy. And please, DON'T turn away from those moments because you are scared about what will happen in the Future. You and me, we really don't know.
PS: Long-forgotten voice of tarot reader: “You had a bitter death in your past life. You were an herbalist or had something to do with plants. You fell in love with someone who didn’t belong to your nation; he loved you back too. But he left and you were heartbroken and died lonely and bitter.

Grits teeth. NO. I wont think like this… and anyway, I cannot stop whatever has to unfold, but I can be happy till Armageddon. Am going to get my tummy scratched.