Sleeping with the boss are you?

Office affairs are fast becoming the rule today and you really can't "blame" anyone for it. People are being thrown together, stress levels are increasing and with more offices becoming non-smoking zone, sex is perhaps the only stress buster. Some fall for their colleagues, others have a drunken shag after an office party and of course we have the 'triangle' situation where two people like each other and someone else is jealous. What really brings a twist to an office affair is when the said affair is between the boss and another, say, you.

How do you maintain a balance at work when you are sleeping with the boss? Do you feel bad if the 'boss' pulls you up for a mistake -- in his professional capacity -- or do dynamics change when there's more to your relationship than professionalism? How do other colleagues react to it? What happens if the boss is already in another relationship or has no intentions of getting into with you: Are you happy being just a shag? What happens when you realise that the boss might be shagging other women too? And what if the boss wants to sleep with you and you aren't too sure if you should?

I mean what is stupider: A woman who sleeps with the boss and feels "used" or a woman who sleeps with the boss expecting exponential gains and then cries foul when there are no gains? Is it prudent to sleep with your boss if there are gains to be achieved, or conversely if you think someone else might take up the offer and you might lose out? I've always had a problem with the casting-couch starlets/neophytes in various industries who first sleep to get ahead and then when things don't really go their way, they start crying. If you have to climb the ladder of success lying down, isn't better to be smarter and ENSURE you get the gains? Hmmm?

Confessions over Coffee: Series
"Should I sleep with my boss?" asked the voice, making one gulp some piping hot coffee. As one waited for the tongue to stop stinging, Friend continued, "My appraisals are due; and from the feelers Boss has been sending my way, I am hoping for a mediocre raise." Re-finding one's voice and tongue, one asked how a mediocre raise translated into sleeping the Boss.

"No, no, you are not getting it. If I respond to those feelers, the raise will be Really Good," Friend explained, "Boss constantly asks me to join him for drinks, messages late at night and has even added me as a friend on Orkut…am his only Orkut-friend in office," she said. One wondered how Boss could manage to be on a social networking site and not be friends with the rest of the office.

"No, no, he created the profile just to be friends with me," Friend elucidated, "No one knows about it, he goes by the name of Hot4U-something… I thought it was flattering and added him on as well." One quickly sipped some more coffee to avoid saying anything at all.

"Are you trying to chicken out of giving me advice?" Friend asked, as her cell phone rang off in the background. Friend put one on hold and answered the call… in one's ear. "That was Boss," Friend announced, "He was asking me out for a movie." One carefully suggested that movies were alwyas nice...

"It's at his place, he has some DVDs," Friend replied, "He thinks I should see more of European movies to get a better understanding of cinema." On asking what European movie her Boss had suggested, Friend replied, "Caligula." One chose sipping and silence again. "So do you think I should sleep with him?" Friend asked. One asked if sleeping with the Boss would get her a 100 per cent raise and a better designation as well.

"Don't be silly," Friend reprimanded one for thinking smart. One was wondering why Friend had bothered to ask at all…
"You see, he is married, might lead to complications later…" Friend announced. Shocked, one asked if she was expecting Hot4Her Boss to fall for her.
"Don't be silly," Friend scolded again, "Just that if I have to be guilty about sleeping with a married man, it might as well be really worth it."

One asked what makes it really worth it? Friend replied, "The CEO, he is married too and sends me feelers as well; so I am thinking…"

(Published March 23, 2007)

Addicted to 'violent porn'

What would you say if you found your 12-year-old watching people being beheaded, mutilated bodies and human beings, either dead or suffering? Or if your 10-year-old daughter demanded a breast implant? Or would you prefer your 15-year-old were part of an online suicide cult?

The latest entrant into the list of child predators – along with pedophiles and teachers who dish out corporal punishment – is the World Wide Web. According to a 1999 report published by the US Senate Committee, “by age 18 a child will have seen 16,000 simulated murders and 200,000 acts of violence.” Through movies, television, video games, newspapers and the mother of all database, the Internet. Increasingly adults and children alike are getting addicted to violence and violent imagery on the Internet and the terminology being used for this addiction is 'violent-porn'.

How would you feel if one of your deceased relatives’ pictures suddenly popped up on a website that publishes real pictures of dead people, those in accidents, with mutilated limbs and suicide pictures taken from police files?

One such family wrote to a website claiming the site had put up a picture that showed the mangled body of their nephew, who had killed himself by getting in the path of a train. They requested the site to remove the picture. The website replied, “We ask that, in the future, this family conduct their suicides in a less public manner.” Sensitive, right?

Freedom of speech and expression are beautiful tenets of this modern world. But does it stop somewhere, should it? What is worrying – more than the presence of such sites – is the fact that it is the susceptible minds of children that are getting hooked.

Popular sites such as ‘Who Would You Kill’ and ‘New Grounds’ focus on killing off celebrities of your choice. The latter is the 12th most popular site for boys aged 11-12 years old. If it’s violence for the boys, it’s plastic surgery for the girls. The Daily Mail reported how a new Internet video game called ‘Bimbo’ has caught the fancy of young girls. Launched a month ago the game has nearly 200,000 British players, most aged 9-16 years.

What’s wrong with the game? Nothing if you see it as a spoof. But does a 9-year-old understand it’s a spoof when she orders breast implants for her ‘Bimbo’ or puts her ‘Bimbo’ on dieting pills? Is it all harmless fun or are we looking at a generation of young girls growing up thinking bigger breasts and a stick-thin figure are what they need and young boys learning to love violence and mutilation? Or are we all over-reacting?
Next Page >>> Who’s responsibility is it?